The Reason for Disappointment Summed up in One Word.

"You know why it bothered you, don't you?"
my friend asked.

Her voice on the phone promised an answer,
one I was curious to hear.

Had she come upon some secret that I had missed til now?

"Expectations," she said.

"You had expectations of what would happen;

you expected it to be different."

It was so simple,

too simple,
and definitely not what I wanted to hear.

Blame would be much more comforting;

pity would offer temporary condolence;

but disappointed expectations?

"If you don't expect anything,
you won't ever be disappointed."
I could feel the conflicting humor in her truth.
It was what I needed to hear and as a true friend, she knew that.
It woke me from my self and stirred my thoughts.


It is the way of expectations.

Violet put 30 eggs under the duck who was feeling broody and had decided to nest.

It hadn't started out that way.

There had been a dozen or so,

but she wanted more ducklings and chickens and saw the sitting duck as an opportunity for more.

Nothing hatched.

All of the eggs had to be thrown out because double-decker eggs in a nest cannot get the proper attention, heat, humidity that they need;

or so found out that momma duck, spread as wide as she could get herself to go

with no tiny chirping to reward her patience.

Violet expected that more would be better,

the apple didn't fall far from her mother's tree;

but contentment with enough is far better than the emptiness of unnecessary more.

I sent a book to a literary agent.
I had written and rewritten it 2 dozen times til I thought it was good.
I had spent months working on a few possible illustrations for it,
hoping they were good enough.



I have heard the stories, taken to heart the warnings of rejections,
but when my answer,
 "Not unique enough,"
 came for something I had put so much of my heart into,
the expectation crashed hard;
the hurt and tears were more than I expected...
because I had expected rejection,
but just not the intensity of the pain of it.

 

Two years ago I made the garden and planted a few of them.

Two years I have watched them, watered them, weeded them, spread their trailing vines to increase their numbers.

We had a few samplings last season, but the increase of flowers and drooping green fruit this year has not gone unnoticed.
Daily I visit that small patch of garden,
admiring the growing fruit that those plants have in their possibilities.

Not to have expectations would be to take the soul out of the work.

All of it has been done to cater to great expectations.

I don't expect a crop failure, but it very well could come.

The chipmunks may come back;

the squirrels may decide to tear out the bushes in search of whatever it is they recklessly decide to dig for;

the chickens may discover the taste of juicy redness;

my 4 year old (who seems to be going through a stage of terrorizing my expectations) may execute her sense of undercover mischief and gobble up the whole patch when it sits just nearing it's prime.

I know the answer I hear on the phone is right.

I know I have to give my expectations to God and take whatever comes,

good or bad.

I know that trials increase faith,
that rejections and disappointments can be the stepping stones to better attempts,
modified goals,
sweeter fruit.

I am just hoping that this patch will avoid calamity and bring fullness of joy:

 because sometimes expectations are fulfilled,
and those times are sweet happiness.

 Deep inside, when the issues are weighed, the truth is:
without occasional disappointed expectations,

the hatching of a dozen ducklings wouldn't seem enough,
the long-awaited title across the front of a book wouldn't be as graciously humbling,

the berries from an anticipated patch wouldn't taste as sweet,

gratitude wouldn't have a chance to blossom...

because isn't that the way we seem to work?

It certainly seems to be the way I do.

I'll tell you for sure when I eat some strawberry shortcake,

because like it or not,
I just can't seem to keep those juicy red fruits out of my dreams.

Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.
Proverbs 13:12

The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.
Proverbs 27:7

By humility and the fear of the LORD are riches, and honour, and life.
Proverbs 22:4




Sharing at:
Kellyskornerblog.com
Homestoriesatoz.com
Savvysouthernstyle.net
notjustahousewife.net
Wearethatfamily.com
Wise-woman-linkup

Pink Blooms, Purple Blooms, and Life.

My gardens have been alive with purple and pink flowers.

Do you see that little pink poking up there?

It is one of my treasures, slow-growing but diligent to come up every year.

It is a hardy orchid.

I have had it for about 5 years now, 

and it finally has a baby next to it.

Bleeding hearts remind me of childhood days at a friend's house.

I loved her mother's bleeding hearts.

 

That rhododendron was one of the first things I planted when we moved here.

See it around the other side of the tree?

Hardy Gernaniums are a favorite because they seem to rebloom all summer.

These pink with black eyes are Patricia Geranium.

I recently read that although they share the name 'Geranium',

annual and hardy geraniums are not related.

Annual geraniums are actually Pelargoniums.

They don't look alike, but they share the same name:

just a curiosity.

These 'Brookside' geraniums grow large and full so that they actually look like a bush.

Planted with them is a patented specially bred Mountain Bluet.

It's blooms are spectacular.

Another purple that I noticed blooming is my Blue False Indigo.

They usually seem to bloom a bit later than this time, especially with how cool it has been this year,

but these are planted up by the barn where the heat radiates off the cement foundation.

Everything up there seems to be advanced.

The Russian sage up there is much larger than the one I have planted by the house.

I love the smell of crushed Russian sage on the hands.

There is lots of purple blooming in the front flower bed as well.

The dwarf wisteria vine stands tall on its trellis.

The salvia is always buzzing with bees.

These Pink Haze Siberian Iris seem to be much more prolific growers for me than the regular iris.

I think the clay content in our soil is not dry enough for regular iris,

but this one fills out so much, I am able to dig some out of it every year to sell at my plant sale.

Of course, the lilacs were grand this spring, too.

Some of the Miss Kim lilac even made it into the kitchen to lend their fragrance.

Apparently, somebody thought they would be good for more than just a bouquet.

Life with children:
giving new meaning to the garden bouquet vignette.


Linking up to these fun blog parties:

Joyfulhomemaking.com

Nominimalisthere

Raisinghomemakers.com

Firefliesandjellybeans.com 

Gnowfglins.com

Puppy Dog Tails and...Greek.

I was looking through pictures this evening.

In home-schooling right now, we are studying Archimedes in science;

in history we are studying life in early Greece,

Cyrus and Ptolemy,

Greek Mythology,

Greek alphabet, coins, city-states, governments;

in art, early Greek sculpture and pottery...

It's rather...

umm...

 if I say interesting, will you believe me?

Actually, I am getting much more out of it this time around,

compared to when I was my daughter's age, but for some reason when I sit down at night to write,

here,

my brain feels like it has turned into the empty blank screen I see.

"Thoughts?

Hello....

 thoughts in this head anywhere?"
and that is how it goes.

The massive amount of Greek knowledge must be taking it's toll.

Besides that, I've had my fingers occupied with working on pieces for my new blog.

How I enjoy doing artwork again!

It isn't Greek to me. 

(Yes, okay, I'll stop with the Greek.)

I know gardening season is just around the next sunshiney day,

so I'm feverishly attacking my list of "MUST-get-done"'s,

like some baby blankets for the new babies breaking onto the scene by various friends and relatives.

 (I love making this kind because it uses up a lot of miscellaneous yarn at the end of skeins

and they don't look like the typical baby blanket. Not that the typical baby blanket isn't sweet and adorable).

 Speaking of spring, my littlest child seems to think that because the sun is shining and there isn't any snow on the ground, shoes and coats are now optional

and toes are to be dipped in freshly thawed waters...

despite the frigid degrees.

Is there a glue to keep socks on?

So as I clicked through my pictures for a bright idea to surface,

I came across these from last summer.

Some pictures don't need words,

and these,

 

well...

 

these were enough for me.

I hope they cheer your day, too.

If not, you could always stop by and listen in on some Greek.

No?

The Moon and I.

Today is Saturday.

Three weeks from today, I will be waking to a day of people

streaming down the driveway

loading up their purchases of the pots that I fill with

little green babies

today.

Today I will work,

work,

work:

from the moment I leave this desk

to the stars blink their watching eyes at me.

I will work with only 5 interruptions from the kids every 10 minutes

because their father is home

so I will send them away to him for the reinstitution of the necessary

snacks to keep them alive.

But I am not alone in my endeavors.

There is always somebody around to make sure I keep moving...

His eyes are not always open,

because he had a long night and dawning day of rat-catching,

squirrel beheading,

mole massacres,

bird bounty hunting,

frog fishing,

and generally terrorizing the local small life

 "You have a rough life, Moon,
don't you?

Okay, 

yes,

 I am glad I am not smaller than you.

But really, Moon, I do wish you wouldn't mess with the frogs.

You could spare them for Levi's sake.

It was just a suggestion, Kitty.


Yes, I do have work to do.
Thanks for the reminder."

Happy Day,

to you and all of yours.

Linking to:

Theprairiehomestead.com: Homestead-barn-hop
Gnowfglins.com

A Wreath from Milk Cartons and Nail Polish...

Living on a budget has never been an easy affair for me,

but we've revamped ours lately,

trying to do the formidable task of saving money.

It's been making me stop and think

when I want to fix things up.

Today I decided I needed to decorate the grapevine wreath 

for the door.

I looked into the recycling bin

for something weather proof.

 I grabbed some colorful nail polishes

(that really ought to be used to give you better-looking fingers to look at,

but the initiation of gardening has been abusive to them),

some wire,

scissors,

and wire cutters,
and some scrap material I had.

After I'd rinsed the 2 milk cartons I'd retrieved,

 I cut as many circles as I could from each carton,

not being fussy about perfection,

as that's not a specialty of mine anyhow.

I cut a spiral out of the circle,

and then added a wavy cut to the outer edge.

I made the first one very large with lots of rounds,

but the rest I made a bit smaller with less turns

 (as I found it used less milk carton.

 I wanted more flowers rather than fuller flowers. )

I cut a small wavy edge on some of the inner circles,

and left some of them round,

just to ad some variety.

I added a piece of floral wire to the smallest part of the inner circle,

twisted it,

and then left it hanging from the bottom.

This would be used to hang the flower to the wreath.

To give the flowers some added depth,
I cut and painted up some double leaves.

(Everybody needs green fingernails once in a while, right?)

Meanwhile, the glue gun was heating.

I started at the center of the flower,

gluing as I twisted it up into shape.

Some of the flowers I touched up with a little white spray paint

and then added the pink glittered nail polish to the centers,

just for some variety.

Using the scrap material,

I cut and slipped it through the wreath,
and made a few material "pom-poms":

 by tearing a strip of fabric,

 wrapping it around my hand,

 tying it tight in the middle,

and then cutting the loops on the ends.

I trimmed the ends a little
and fluffed them up before tying them to the wreath
as a sort of filler.

I also found some of last season's dried hydrangeas
on one of the bushes

and tucked them in.

It made me glad to see my free wreath I'd gotten from pruning 

looking happy with a bit of spring...

...and my money will stay in my envelopes for better things...

... like apples, bananas, peanuts, napkins, vitamins, toilet paper, tooth paste...

Linking up to these places:

Keeping it Simple:Motivate me Monday
Funkyjunkinteriors.net
Funkyjunkinteriors.blogspot.com
Centsationalgirl.com
Littlenaturalcottage.com
Gnowfglins.com: Simple-lives-Thursday
Savvysouthernstyle.blogspot.com: Wow-us-Wednesdays 
We Are That Family

Raisinghomemakers.com
Hip Homeschool Moms.com: Homeschool Hip Hop
The Prairie Homestead: Homestead Barn Hop
Betweennapsontheporch.blogspot: Metamorphosis Monday

Craft-O Maniac

The House In The Roses

DIY Show Off Project Parade

Making The World Cuter

Not Just a Housewife - Show Me What Ya Got
A Bowl Full of Lemons
Home Stories a to z 
My Uncommon Slice of Suburbia
 Far Above Rubies: Domestically Divine 
Hip Homeschool Moms: Hip Homeschool Hop 
The*The CSI Project

Tip Me Tuesday - Tip Junkie

How To's Day - The Lettered Cottage (last Tuesday of each month) 

Tabletop Tuesday - A Stroll Thru Life